Finding the real Chelsea

Chelsea is funny and caring. She’s always the one asking what people are up to, she loves getting out and about, helping out others and spending time with the people around her.

But when Chelsea first moved to our Portsmouth supported living home last November, things were very different.

Chelsea was very quiet and would spend most of her time in her flat not wanting to socialise or get involved with the people around her. She was struggling with her mental health and found it difficult to trust others.

Throughout her life, Chelsea had experienced a lot of instability. Previous placements had broken down and she had been moved on more than once. She had never really had the consistency she needed to feel safe with the people around her, so building trust was going to take time.

Building trust

Over the following months, Chelsea began self-harming more frequently and the severity increased, at times she needed hospital treatment.

Chelsea wasn’t ready to open up about how she was feeling and would often keep things to herself. She did not trust the people supporting her.

Molly said: “She’s never really had someone constant there. People have always left or she’s been moved on.”

As the team got to know Chelsea better, they worked closely with colleagues from FitzRoy’s Positive Behaviour Support (PBS) team and mental health lead, as well as external health professionals including psychologists, psychiatrists and occupational therapists to understand what Chelsea needed.

“I think once she realised we were here to help and we were going to keep coming back, she started to feel safe enough to open up and trust us.”

Together, they put a safety plan in place and agreed on what to do when Chelsea was struggling. The important thing was consistency, and making sure everyone approached things in the same way.

The team also looked at how Chelsea’s past experiences might be affecting how she felt and behaved. Rather than telling her what she should or shouldn’t do, they focused on helping her feel safe, listening to her and involving her in decisions about her support.

Bex from our PBS team says it was the team’s willingness to learn and work together that made the difference. “The team have worked so hard to make sure they are providing the right support for Chelsea. They’ve adapted their approach as they’ve got to know her better.”

Kim said: “What Chelsea needed from us was very different to the other people living there, but the team have been really responsive. They’ve increased their skills and adapted how they work to make sure they can support her in the best way possible.”

Learning to ask for help

One of the biggest changes has been Chelsea’s ability to reach out when things feel difficult. Before, she might have kept her feelings to herself. Now, if she’s struggling, she reaches out to one of the team and asks someone to come and sit with her.

Now, Chelsea had gone two months without self-harming. She’s incredibly proud of her progress and regularly tells the team how long she has gone without hurting herself.

Molly said: “The fact that she’ll now say, ‘I’m having some bad thoughts, can someone come up?’,  is unbelievable. She never would have done that before.”

Finding the real Chelsea

As Chelsea began to feel safer and more comfortable at home, she was more about to be herself and her personality started to shine through.

The quiet person who once preferred to be left alone is now making plans with her housemates and inviting people into her flat. She’s been to the cinema with others at home and is looking forward to more outings.

She’s also got way more involved at home and loves helping others out. Recently, a member of staff was doing the food shopping for another person at home when Chelsea asked if she could come along. She took the shopping list, helped fill the basket, pushed the trolley around and helped put everything away afterwards.

Molly says, “This is her home, she runs this house now!”

Chelsea has also become much more comfortable with closeness and affection. Where she once found it difficult, she now asks for hugs and invites people to come and sit with her. She’s also finding her own ways to show love and care to the people around her.

For most of us, helping with the food shopping, going to the cinema or asking someone for a hug might sound like ordinary things. For Chelsea, they are signs that she has found people she trusts in a home where she feels safe.